Compliment or Criticism: Choose Your Focus

For some reason, it seems humans are more inclined to focus on the negative, rather than the positive.  While we appreciate compliments, a single criticism, no matter how small, not only tends to erase the good feeling brought on by the compliment, but makes us angry, frustrated or sad.  I had this experience this morning.  I ran into a friend of mine, who told me that she started reading my novel last night and couldn't put it down.  "Really engaging," she said.  Of course, that made me feel great!  Less than thirty minutes later, I ran into someone else, who criticized something I did yesterday, behavior that he clearly misunderstood, but his comments were enough to piss me off.  At home, I came into my office and sat, staring at my computer screen for 10-15 minutes, so angry that every time I started typing something, I deleted it.  Nothing seemed right.  Then, I realized what had happened.  I decided to ask the Runes how to allow the positive into my life, while letting the negative roll away.

Othala, the last Rune in the Futhark, offers a very interesting overview, focused on the positive.  While Othala is the Rune of inheritance and the homestead, we must look beyond this face value to find its underlying meaning.  It is about the foundation for the way we live our lives.  It is not an entitlement, rather reminds us to appreciate the gifts we receive that allow us to create the life we want.  Although the meaning tends to be geared toward the gifts we've received from ancestors in the form of traditions, property, and inherited characteristics, when we are building our homestead (the life we want), we also receive gifts in the present from friends and family.  This is where our focus should be, but how do we do it?

Well, Raido reminds us that life is a journey.  The Rune of riding or a carriage, travels on the path we take to establish our homestead on a foundation of the gifts we receive.  We must move forward; that is how we progress.  However, what we must be aware of is that the path our journey takes us on is not going to be straight and smooth.  It will contain bumps, curves, dips, hills, bridges, a whole variety of things that make our journey interesting.  Unfortunately, we will hit potholes and other disruptive features in our road, but our challenge is that we must manage and get past those annoyances, so that we can enjoy the rest of the ride and the amazing scenery that surrounds us.  Again, we ask how to do it?

 Can you guess the answer?  It is, of course, Jera, the Rune of the harvest.  As we have seen many times before, a bountiful harvest represents the fruits of a long process.  This means that there is no easy answer to our question, that removing and not allowing negative energy to chip away at our homestead's foundation will take time.  What we can do is make a commitment to the process.  Realize that the power is within us to dwell on the things we choose.  Therefore, as I starting point, I choose to dwell on my friend's positive words about my novel and build on that.

Before I end this post though, I'd like to offer something positive to you.  Simply by reading my blog, you have done two positive things.  First, you made me feel good by reading my writing.  Second, and more importantly, you have given yourself a tool to help you shed negative energy.  So, when someone says something negative to you, stop and think about all the positive things people have said to you and feed on that instead.

Have a positively beautiful week.

A Mix of Routine and Spontaneity

Lately, I've been feeling like my days are getting away from me and I'm not accomplishing the things that I want or need to do.  So, although I am still getting things done, it doesn't seem like it and it doesn't feel very rewarding.  I need to get back to schedules and "to do" lists, but I don't want to get tied down to a predictable and humdrum existence.  So, how can I find a balance, where I have enough routine to be productive, but not so much that my life loses all signs of spontaneity?

As I am in the process of making my own set of Runes on wooden staves, I decided that, this week, I would try a different approach to my draw.  In fact, I did a toss or a roll, instead of pulling them out of the bag.  With the staves, I can't draw them out of a bag, if for no other reason than they will be different sizes, so I might be inclined to avoid the skinny Isa, for example, and choose fat Dagaz.  Instead, I will give them all a toss and choose the three that are closest to the center of the pile and face up.  Using my current Runes for this week's question and following that course, I got Othala, Thurisaz, and Jera.

I must admit, Othala as the overview gave me pause.  I thought for a while about how this Rune represents the current situation and I realized that the Rune of inheritance and home represents something more basal than inheritance and home.  It signifies the foundation of tradition.  While our goal is to enjoy our home life, which is another attribute of this Rune, to do that, we must look to the past to see how enjoying the home was achieved before.  For me, this is very telling, because I find I am most effective when I have a somewhat set schedule and, more recently, a "to do" list.  The latter is especially handy these days, when my life isn't my own, rather I am coordinating my family of four.  What Othala says to me is, "Look back to when your life and home were in order.  Why was it so?"

Thurisaz, the Rune of giants and thorns, as the challenge is perfect.  I like this Rune, because it is about focusing power.  If we are honest with ourselves, that is the challenge we face through this question.  We all have the power to be productive; after all, everything is pure potential when it begins.  Therefore, we have the potential within us to focus our power or efforts on creating a more productive and satisfying daily life.  We can choose to create obstacles, tear them down or go around them.

It is no surprise then that Jera is our required action.  You all know this is my favorite Rune, the Rune of the harvest.  However, what we must recognize is that in order for the harvest to occur and be bountiful, we must follow a process.  If we think of the things we have to do in our lives as being different crops, we begin to see that each plant has its own requirements.  Some plants need more sun, while others need more water.  Some grow in soil that stunts other plants.  It is this detail of the process that we must address.  How much time does each aspect of our lives require?  Which things are necessary for survival and which are merely wants?  Don't get me wrong,  I'm not saying we should ignore wants or give no time to them.  What I am suggesting is that we make this distinction to help us prioritize.  Where our needs create our routine, our wants give way to spontaneity.

Taking Control of the Situation

So often, we let life happen to us and feel we are helpless in a given situation, but what if we say, "No more!"  What if we take control of the situation or, better still, of our own destiny, of our own happiness?  In general, I am a take-charge kind of person, but lately, I have given in to views that we must follow a mundane path, work for "the man", waste away in a job or multiple jobs that make us miserable and take us away from the things that should be our priorities, things that make us happy.  I decided to ask the Runes what would happen if I decided to take back control of my path.  They did not disappoint in their guidance.

I could draw no better Rune to represent the overview of this line of questioning than Raido, the Rune of Riding, taking a journey.  If we expect to progress, we must move, preferably forward.  That is part of the traditional meaning behind this Rune.  It also highlights a change from where we are either physically or mentally.  New age meanings say this journey is one of healing and removing obstacles.  Both interpretations play a role here.  We are, as traditional meanings suggest, on a mental journey, which is complemented by new age meanings of healing and removing obstacles.  After all, we are seeking a shift in our mindset from doing what we are told we should do to one where we are taking control.  We must remove the ideas that others have placed in our minds to get a fresh perspective and consider new possibilities.  To do that, we must be strong in this commitment.

That is why Tiwaz/Teiwaz, Týr's Rune is our challenge.  We know this Rune well, having drawn it now four times in the last three months (State of the World, Opportunities in the New Year, The Role it Plays).  This is the Rune of Strength and, though it serves as our challenge, by challenging us, Týr's Rune lends us strength, because we love a challenge.  We will take control of the situation, each of us in our own way, and we will be strong through this process, because we must be to break the cycle of frustration that we live in trying to fulfill someone else's image of what our role should be.  We are warriors in this pursuit.

Othala/Othila, the Rune of Inheritance and Home gives us our required action.  This Rune is interesting in that its traditional and contemporary interpretations don't seem to align, yet they do and very well.  You see, while traditional interpretations focus on appreciating the gifts we receive from our ancestors, whether property or skill, contemporary ones lean more towards acquiring a benefit after giving up something to which you're accustomed.  In other words, to reap the benefits from and truly enjoy the gifts bestowed on us by our ancestors, sometimes we must give up something else.  In this case, it is being strong with Tiwaz providing us with the strength we need to break away or separate from the path we are on currently and find the path that will make us happy and allow us to make the most of our inherited gifts.

Don't get me wrong.  I am not suggesting total abandonment of your current life in one fell swoop, unless you have the capacity to do it.  I am suggesting conscious rerouting in such a way that, if disruption occurs, it doesn't negatively impact your family or livelihood.  Sometimes slow breaks require more strength than immediate ones, but they are worth the struggle to get to a place where you are in control of your own life.